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Thursday, May 24, 2007

New Job for Wolfowitz!

If ever there was a perfect resume for any job, then Paul Wolfowitz is the man with the ideal credentials. So says Maureen Dowd, in an excellent New York Times op-ed, appropriately headlined "An Experienced Destroyer". Starting with Wolfie's CV,in an article dripping with sarcasm and vitriol, Ms Dowd tears into Wolfowitz, a man widely acknowledged in a bipartisan consenus, to being singulalry responsible for much of America's present foreign policy muddles.

"WORK EXPERIENCE
President of World Bank : 2005-07
Responsibilities : Reining in European lefties, raining tax-free money on Arab girlfriend, and giving anti-corruption efforts in bad name.
Achievements: Paralysed the international lending apparatus to the point where small countries had to max out their Visa cards to pay for malaria medicine. Learned the traditions of many cultures, including those of Turkey, where you apparently are not supposed to take off your shoes at mosques to reveal socks so full of holes that both big toes poke blasphemously through.
Deputy Secretary of defence for President Bush : 2001-05
Responsibility : Starting a war.
Achievements : Mismanaged the world’s most powerful army. Shattered the system of international diplomacy that kept the peace for 50 years. Undermined the credibility of American intelligence operations. Needlessly brought humankind to the brink of nuclear war. Destroyed Iraq.
Demented Visionary : 1993- 2001
Responsibility : Concocting a delusional plan for regime change in Iraq with pals like Shaha Riza, Ahmad Chalabi and his merry band of Iraqi exiles who conjured up phoney intelligence about Saddam’s WMD.
Achievements : Imagining an Iraq that didn’t exist.

Having Wolfie back on the job market is a tremendous opportunity. What do we want next destroyed? Could this walking curse on the world run Halliburton into the ground? At the Pentagon, Wolfie tried to help the Vice get rid of anything multi-multilateral treaties, multilateral institutions, multilateral alliances, multiculturalism. Multi, to them, meant wobbly, caviling, bureaucratic and obstructionist. Why be multi when you can be uni?"

So what is Wolfowitz waiting for. There is the big job up for grabs, come November, 2008, for the President of the United States. It will be an ideal stage for Wolfowitz and his neo-con cronies to do an Attila makeover of the rest of the world. Further, the Americans themselves can have a taste of the Wolfie medicine which both Iraq and the World Bank have been privileged to have received. Till then, as a build up and to perfect his already considerable skills for the job, Dick Cheney could think of letting Wolfowitz loose on Halliburton!!

Move over Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, and Rudy Guiliani! Let's roll out the carpet for Paul Wolfowitz as the 44th and the last President of the USA!! Hail the neo-conservative movement!

1 comment:

Quintessential Critic (Sudhir Narayana) said...

Couldn't have been written any better!